Steven: "If these had been pop tarts, we'd both be
Mallory: "Alex, I told you whenever you take a message to write down who
called, when they called, and what it was about."
Alex: "I did. Somebody stupid called, sometime today, about something
Mallory: "Alex, you know that could be *ANY* one
of my friends!"
Alex: "What? Am I a weatherman? I'm just a kid in high school!"
Alex: "Think what we're doing. We're taking a simple peasant girl and we're
transforming her into somebody who could even have a conversation with me!"
Jennifer: "I think you're gonna have to give her a little more incentive than
Mallory: "Come on, Alex. You're getting a little too pompous even for
Alex: "Good evening. Keaton Manor. Oh, dad... I meant, in a manor of speaking,
Steven: "The fat man has landed. The eagle walks alone."
Steven: "Nick, when did you first become interested in art?"
Nick: "I don't know."
Steven: "Could you expand on that?"
Nick: "I-I-I-I-I D-O-O-O-O-N-T K-N-O-O-O-O-W."
Steven: "I see..."
Nick: "Dad, don't interrupt him!"
Steven: "I'm sorry, Nick, what were you going to say after I-I-I-I-I
Nick: "I-I-I-I-I D-O-O-O-O-N-T R-E-M-E-M-B-E-R."
Steven: "So, Nick, do you go to school?"
Steven: "Could you be a little more specific?"
Nick: "Yeah, like, when school's on, I'm not
Nick: "I'm sorry I'm not the type of guy you want Mallory to go out with.
You know, I ain't no Charles Bronson."
Alex: "All right, Mallory, Subaru me."
Mallory: "It's Shihatsu."
Alex: "Bless you."
Nick: "A-a Alex, how's my little friend?"
Alex: "A-a Nick, how's my little neandrathal?"
Alex: "Come on dad. Are you planning to stay mad at us forever?"
Steven: "That is my plan."
Steven: "Parents are conditioned to accept a few mishaps. A broken vase,
some spilled milk on the floor... There was a kangaroo in my living room."
Alex: "It was just here for the party."
Nick: "How you's doin'?"
Alex: "We's doin' fine Nick."
Nick: "A - lex"
Alex: "Ni - ick"
Alex: "So Ellen tells me you're rich... richly deserving of many compliments,
Mr. Reed: "So you're Ellen's boyfriend."
Alex: "That is correct."
Mr. Reed: "What are you a dancer, poet, communist?"
Alex: "No sir, I'm against all those things."
Mr. Reed: "Well, that's refreshing."
Alex: "I stand before you as a representative of all that is decent in this
country and I might add I'm very sympathtic to the upper classes. Getting
back to your wealth, Ellen tells me you're a coorporate lawyer."
Mr. Reed: "That's right we deal in..."
Alex: "Acquisitions, anti-trust matters, takeovers, statutory mergers."
Mr. Reed: "Are you interested in the law?"
Alex: "Yes, sir... as it pertains to money."
Elyse: "What did you mean when you said you weren't a woman?"
Alex: "I'm not. I hate to break it to you this
Elyse: "Steven, what are you going to do? She's eighteen! What do we do?
Steven: "Oh yes, we can ground her. Ground her as she's never been grounded
before. Ground her deep, ground her long, ground
Steven: "Since when did he start going by Bob?"
Elyse: "Steven, does it really matter?"
Steven: "Yes it does, Elyse. I'd like to know if I'm talking to my brother
Rob or Disco Bob."